What does “being good enough” mean?
Photo by Denes Kozma on Unsplash
You know what it’s like to feel like you’re not good enough.
It’s a question you ask yourself all the time, and it’s one that comes from a place of insecurity.
The thing is: this is all a pattern of behaviour that starts at home (or even before) and you can change it (if you choose to!).
When you’re told you’re not good enough, it’s easy to start doubting your abilities and wonder who you are. You may even doubt your life choices/decisions and wonder if you chose the right path. You may go down that rabbit hole of comparing yourself against your peers, co-workers, family, friends, and social media, amplifying those doubts and insecurities.
For example, if you were told growing up that you should become a doctor, lawyer, accountant, or engineer and didn’t end up being one of those professions, you might feel like you haven’t lived up to your parents’ expectations. You might feel like you need to keep proving your worthiness throughout your career — and sometimes that means getting more promotions or making more money — which can lead to anxiety about whether or not you’re going to be able to retire at 65 with a guaranteed pension!
It’s challenging to reflect on why you take your next job/career decision because it takes work to understand your values and what YOU want out of your job/career. It’s somehow “easier on the mind” just to jump into another job if it offers more money and a perceived sense of security. Have you thought about what YOU want to use all that extra money for? Or what the purpose of money means to you?
When you look at your next job/career decision — whether it’s a lateral move or a promotion, consider a moment to reflect and ask yourself: “Why am I doing this?” If the answer is “because my parents want me to be an accountant” or “because my friends are doctors” or “because everyone expects me to be successful because I went to college/university and I should get promoted right away because I deserve it,” then you may want to consider whether that job/career move is the right one for you.
Here are 3 ways to remind yourself to feel good about yourself:
1. Take a day off and do something that makes you happy. If you can take some time off for yourself, take the opportunity to do the things you want to do for yourself, and no one else.
2. Reflect on what makes you happy and write it down. Remember the moments that bring you joy and be specific about what makes you happy and why. Remind yourself of the feelings of joy — see, feel and hear those feelings to access what brings you pure joy.
3. Make sure that your actions align with your values and goals. Check in with yourself and observe if your daily actions align with your greater values and goals in your career. If you need some support with alignment, feel free to book a session to get started on helping you become more aligned with your career path.
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Thanks as always, for taking the time to read my articles.
